You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
