Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
