Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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