Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Randomize
