bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
