8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
my poor anus
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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