dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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