Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I need water and some morals
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
