I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
