i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize