Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize