is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
