Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
