READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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