I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize