In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
