oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
In America we eat man semen.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
