I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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