How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
