i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
