Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
