i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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