Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
