Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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