am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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