I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
