I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
