she looked like the bat from fern gully.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
