He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
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