Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
only you would photoshop your dick
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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