So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
