Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
