Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Randomize