please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Green mimosas i think yes
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
