theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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