I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
