Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
