I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
what day is it and did you see me today?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
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