i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
i love accidental penises.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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