so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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