Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
