i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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