And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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