1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Life is so much better after having sex.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
