Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
