Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
