But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
