we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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