That's intense
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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