I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize